Famous Blogger sucked into Second Life, Disappears

It was a regular Thursday afternoon. The social media moguls at digital agency Crayon were about to start their weekly “Coffee with Crayon” meeting in Second Life. The avatars were just settling in on Crayonville Island, when the unthinkable happened.

Joseph Jaffe, Head Crayon, suddenly disappeared from his office. Irresistibly sucked into his computer, he appeared in what seemed like a flesh-and-blood personage in Second Life. Glancing around at the funky-looking avatars of his colleagues, he laughed gleefully and teleported off the island, and has not been seen since.

“We’re devastated,” said Greg Verdino, 40-something crayonista, enjoying his third breakfast in a now quite relaxed schedule. “One minute my avatar was insulting his avatar, and then the real Jaffe showed up on my computer screen, wildly leaping around Crayonville. He even spilled my half-caff double mocha unsweetened lo-cal Amandaccino. Disappearing, I get. But leave my morning fix alone!

“Given his penchant for not showing up for things, this whole thing was doubly surprising – if he hadn’t had on his famous “Joe Jaffe” nametag, I wouldn’t have believed it was really him!”

According to Jane Quigley, grandniece (twice removed) of Alexander Haig, who used to report to Greg Verdino, “I guess I’m in charge around here! Given the fact that we were a virtual agency, I don’t think any of our clients will really notice the difference anyway. Maybe once he’s done exploring all the other Second Life islands, he’ll get tired of his new digs, and come on back for Coffee with Crayon. But I’m still running the joint. We, umm, unplugged his computer.”

Joe’s family was understandably upset by the incident, but a life-sized cardboard cut-out of his avatar has been placed in the family room to remind them of his absence. In the meantime, a posse of bloggers has been assembled who plan to infiltrate Second Life and see if they can bring the rogue crayonista back. Their progress can be tracked on Twitter at @wheresJaffe. Faint iPhone signals were last detected at the Delta Airlines virtual terminal, so he may have hopped a flight on his favorite carrier for parts unknown.

All others are urged to keep an eye out for anyone wearing the tell-tale Joseph Jaffe nametag, and to alert appropriate authorities immediately – or Geoff Livingston, whichever comes first.

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